the hardest seasons

“Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” (Philip K. Dick – science-fiction author) popcorn instead of lie the advantage I took out of the sand where I lived like a son the crispy flesh of time faith eating the fibres of my skeleton hope breathing slowly had a heart a lollapalooza to rely on its offspring in every thought dragooned to open doors where hungry souls couldn't find enough bread haunted by tigers at random hours inviting me to their feast I went deaf at the sound of despair mine now I’m breathing through my scars slowly and gray tunes of future pass me by should I seek for my youth and hear how those round incantations made a difference should I ask you to get closer will it take the dolour I am turning gray and breathing slowly a heavy sign I'd love to see the kid of my kid wondering “what's up with the sun” I'd tell him there is no better heart for earth just poetries and choices