the stranger II

nothing changes

I find that which I do not seek

meanwhile I keep reading stuff to get sober

for instance about the times when stones used to

attach wings to their sandals and amber cufflinks

greenish twinkles in the sunlight and still felt bitter

I listened to some peoples stories whispered to others`

ears kept talking till they got fed up with loneliness

and rushed away stepping bluntly over my shadow

anyway it is so much easier to endure others than oneself

I again revised all gods´ sakes and their mothers´ names

now I only have to order them alphabetically

and close the damn book

I got savagely drunk on witty words and love facts

my beauty is just as you know it generally doing well

particularly victims and finally undergoing self-destruction like

highly improbable monsters in bad American movies

head-aches are being a pain in my stomach

don’t really remember what is it after I vomit the last illusions into the chloroform jar

every dull morning I throw myself through the penthouse window

towards a new one-way day

with a coffee pot near at hand

every time something else always the same unrepeatable up to excess

then I wondered who’s who in whose indifferent grave

matter of perspective rather than signature

and who can cry louder or be quiet longer

it occurred to me I could see some words all dressed up in negligees

making a show of themselves among sand milk and water

sort of light signals left behind by flying snails on the palm of the text

I carry mine on the other side

walk on wire with my sun umbrella

and watch you swing the orange bicycle on the opposite string

with only one toe

that lady is watching both of us absent-mindedly

and I pretend to be you two-three stanzas short